10th of March

-SOUNDTRACK FOR THIS EPISODE : The Times - Gadisku Dalam Koma-

Assalamualaikum...

I never start an episode with a salam...But this episode is too meaningful for me...

10 MARCH 2005,the date for one of the most bitter event of my life...

One of the darkest event of my life...

I always wanted to write about this on the same date(2009,of course) but,herm...Nevermind...

Before that,I'd like to wish Happy Birthday to Assif(same date)...

10th of MARCH 2005,My Mother went to meet Allah...

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It was early morning at my Aunt's crib in Kota Damansara...Too early for me at least,when My Father woke me up...

"Lekaih(cepat) bangun!!!"

I was very sleepy...I thought about going to the bathroom to brush my teeth but My Father told me there was no time to spare...I obeyed My Father's order,and quickly change my clothes...I can't really think about anything back then...But a statement woke me from my slumber...A statement that I heard from My Father...

"Mak dah tenat..."

My Mother was admitted in Pantai Medical Centre...December 2004...Yeah,that was the date when she was admitted there...In 2004,some assholes "santau"-ed her...Yes,this might seem a bit stupid but yes,somebody used black magic against her...I can still remember My Mom telling me that she felt immense pain during Maghrib...But still,she stood up and perform maghrib prayers...She completed her role as a devoted Muslim...She didn't miss any prayers...

Whem My Mother told My Father about the pain,he took her to a nearby hospital...In 2004,we still live in Ipoh...So,he took her to Ipoh's Specialist Hospital...But the doctor couldn't find anything wrong with her...Everything seems fine...Normal blood pressure,normal sugar level... Absolutely nothing...By then,we realized that,

"Ada orang buat nih..."

After that,My Father took her to a bomoh...Black magic needs to be cure traditionally...I didn't follow him that day...But My Father told Me and My 4 Siblings that glass shards,hairs,"miang buluh" and other scary things came out of her stomach...And she felt pain...I love pain,but when it involves one of your own,it's not fun anymore...It's scary...

Even with countless number of treatment,traditional or modern,My Mom is still sick...One fateful day,she was diagnosed with cancer...I dunno th specific word for it but something related to her womb...The santau worsens resulting in cancer...Huh...So,she was sent to Pantai Medical Centre in KL...

She did chemotheraphy...And I cried when I watched her after the treatment...So weak...I'd chance to take care of My Mother for a weekend...Although she scolded me sometimes,I still felt that it was worthwhile...

One day,the doctor that is taking care of brought Me,My Father and My other Siblings outside of her room and said sentences that I will never forget...

"We can't do anythng else for her...She didn't have much time left...We will try to make her as comfortable as we can while she is still with us..."

Can you imagine what it feels like to hear those words???I can't take it anymore...I cried like a baby...This is too much for a boy to consume...My Mother was sleeping when I sat beside her and recite Yaasiin with tears streaming down...I love her so much...Too much,it hurts...

09th MARCH 2005...My whole family went to visit her...Actually,to take care of her during the day...My Sis will take care of her for the night...But during the day,My Mother didn't woke up from her sleep...We thought that it is normal for her to behave like that,considering all the medicine and drugs that is being pumped into her system...

10th MARCH 2005...On the way to the hospital from my aunt's house,My Sis called My Father... She was crying when she said this...

"Mak dah takdak...Masa azan Subuh..."

My Father immediately parked at the roadside and told My Big Bro to drive...He couldn't take it any longer...I heard the conversation between My Father and My Sis,but I tend to ignore...It's because at that time,I didn't believe a single word that came out from My Sis's mouth regarding My Mother...

But when we arrived at the hospital,strange feelings overwhelmed me...And those feelings were not nice...With each step towards the room where My Mom was held,I felt heavier,both physically and mentally...I just wanted to run away from the hospital...When the door was opened,I saw My Sis crying...Then,I saw a body on the bd inside the room...That person is My Mom...She's no longer with me,with us...She had a very calm look on her face...

I told Myself to be strong...But I am just a weak soul...I cried like I had never cry before...I never cried like that in my entire life...My Sis had to calm me down...One part of my heart is gone...My Queen is gone...One part of my soul is gone...Slowly,I regain my strength and wipe my tears...I walked towards the lifeless body of My Mom,and kiss her forehead...

"Mak,Afiq sayang sangat kat Mak..."

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Since My Mom passed away,I have an uncomplete life...I cried when I listen to songs regarding a human being with the title Mother...The song "Gadisku Dalam Koma" by The Times,left a deep scar in my soul...

The Times - Gadisku Dalam Koma.

Gadisku dalam koma
Seriuskah keadaannya
Gadisku dalam koma
Seriuskah situasinya

Dengarkanlah
Lagu ini bila sedar
Betapa pilu tangisku
Ku berikrar takkan ingkar
Mogakan sembuh segera

Gadisku dalam koma
Seriuskah keadaannya
Gadisku dalam koma
Seriuskah situasinya

Maafkanlah
Diri ini jika pernah
Salah dan silap dengan mu
Ku berdoa ke atas-Nya
Moga kau pulih semula

Gadisku dalam koma
Seriuskah keadaannya
Gadisku dalam koma
Seriuskah situasinya

"Mak,Afiq sayang sangat kat Mak...Afiq rindu sangat kat Mak...Tenanglah Mak kat sana..."

Nakhiah bte Md.Nor(17/09/1951 - 10/03/2005)
Al-Fatihah...

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